Did you know? A change in perspective is the biggest gift you can give yourself? How we look at things determines how we act. Today, let us have a chat on the topic, Person vs. Problem. I will offer an insight into how we can resolve conflicts in our day to day lives by simply changing the way we address a situation.
In my experience of working with couples, children, parents and caregivers, I often find the approach adopted to resolve any conflict is skewed.
Let me explain…(pause). When two individuals are in a disagreement, the focus tends to be on the person and not the problem.
You are always late!
You spend a lot of money!
You don’t help me around the house.
Sound familiar? Now, let us try and rephrase these sentences keeping the problem as the main subject.
Traffic is a real issue. It is best to start early so that you can get home on time.
We are on a tight budget. Let us spend wisely. I know you will!
Dinner time is hectic for me. I would really appreciate your help with the kids.
See? Now the focus is on the problem rather than on the person. As you identify the problem, the solution follows.
The result?
1. Effective communication
2. Calmer selves
3. Solution-oriented approach
4. Less personal, more practical!